Queen Daemok
by DianaChaseKirkland
Summary: No matter how turbulent the waters are, they will always regain their calm. Princess Hwangbo Yeon Hwa - now Queen Daemok of Goryeo - reflects on her life after her marriage to her half-brother So. Yeon Hwa-centric. / / Part One in the Goryeo Chronicles./ /


_**A/N: First part on my Goryeo Chronicles series!**_ ** _For more details about this series, check my bio ;)_**

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 _ **Goryeo, 971**_

"That was the last of the day's petitioners, Your Majesty," the assistant finally announced. Wang So stretched his neck and arms, letting out a short breath through his nose. One of the men passed another scroll to the assistant and he handed it carefully to the king, who placed it on the small pile on one side of his desk.

"Your Majesty," he said again. So looked up. "You have worked all day, and your illness passed not too long ago. Please, take care of your health and go rest."

He made a small smile. "Indeed, I am very tired." He turned to his left. "The queen has been coping beside me the whole day. She must be tired as well."

Yeon Hwa had not done much except stand at her husband's side – upright and poised, always a step below the throne dais – and look queenly to all the subjects who had come in that day with petitions for the king. Said a few encouraging words now and then, for effect, and entertained the noble women while the clan heads presented their cases. Still, she was weary and fatigued, and all she could think about was a warm bath and a good night's sleep.

"Thank you for your hard work," he said in his kingly voice, looking at her.

"Thank you, Your Majesty." She answered equally, as she bowed her head.

He put his hands on his knees. "I think we are both tired tonight. I will dine light and go to bed. You go get some rest."

She smiled, the courtly, perfect smile she was so used to. "Then I will take my leave. Have a good night, Your Majesty." She bowed again.

He nodded and turned back to the desk.

"My Queen," the servants bowed at the door as she left the throne room and headed to her quarters.

After taking her bath, and soaking in the warm waters for a long time, she had her hair brushed, her night clothes arranged and then sent everyone from the room. Sitting at her dresser, as she smoothed out a few strands of her somewhat less lustrous black hair, the implacable mirror stared back at the aged woman.

She had born five children. She was not in the prime of her youth anymore, but – she decided – years had not yet begun to weigh her down. It was a rather comfortable stage. She was old enough to be a respected and experienced queen, but not so old that she had entirely lost the charm of a princess.

An envoy from the king's quarters interrupted her musings, saying His Majesty had been served two whole teapots of what happened to be her favorite tea, which she was short on, so he sent her one to enjoy and help her sleep. She thanked the king for the gesture, and since she was feeling particularly good, she granted the young servant a purse of coins.

When he left she poured herself a cup of the fragrant liquid. It soothed her, indeed. So knew she often felt weary during winter in the last years, and at this point of their lives, despite their differences, he tried to make sure she was comfortable.

A not just unlikely, but rather _unfathomable_ thought a while back.

The first years of their marriage were just impossible. Had it not been for her insistence on meeting him frequently, with some sort of excuse, the most they would see of each other would be passing by the hallway or the courtyard. Even when they met, he did not speak more than a few words to her, and after the birth of their first child – a son – his sightings became even less frequent.

She did not even know if she was angry or just disappointed. She knew her half-brother to be awfully considerate and soft-hearted, somewhere deep down, and the fact that not even his own flesh and blood would move him stirred her resentment.

He argued she was only biding her time to put her son on the throne. She believed nothing. She had no need to do that, after all. There was much opposition but hardly any good claimants, and So kept an iron fist on any possible stirrings. Ju would eventually become king, sooner or later – as much as So also mistrusted and resented him.

No, what she really wanted was him to show some care for the boy, for her boy. And there was no complicated reason as to why he did not: Ju was not _that_ woman's son.

It went on for years.

As a part of their deal, and his intentions to strengthen the royal family from the inside, relaying less and less on the clans, she was with child many more times. But none of them were particularly pleased with the situation. All arrangements and meetings would stop once the pregnancy was confirmed, and after the births, So rarely appeared – not even when their second son was lost.

Yet at some point, after a very long time, he eventually saw sense and began to be a father to their children, especially after the birth of their second daughter.

Even now, he could not be much more than a respected – and still feared – king and progenitor to Ju, who was a man grown already. She very much doubted their relationship could do better than that at this point.

However, his daughters became that rare light of his eyes – and she had given him three. No one had seen him smile and laugh as openly as he did with them, and nothing was ever too much if it was for the princesses of Goryeo.

If left up to the king, he would probably allow them anything they wanted in any aspect of their lives, including, now that they were no longer little girls, who and where they would marry.

Apparently, he also kept in mind that such a thing might not be entirely possible, not if he also wanted to see his efforts to centralize the royal power through. Yeon Hwa did not doubt he was beginning to make his own arrangements regarding potential marriages, as he had, surprisingly, done for Ju's earlier in the year, and she had an inkling she might not like half of them when she knew about it – much like Ju's.

In the meantime, however, as the eldest was not yet old enough for him to let go of, no man could do so much as glance upon them in any admiring way, in his presence at least.

She smirked. Her own father was right when he said that fathers with daughters became fools.

It had taken a lot more for him to approach her as a companion of sorts, with something other than slight hostility or plain detachment. After three living children they began to have meals together, first in uncomfortable silence. Later on, they found they had many things to talk about. Their lives had not been easy, one way or the other.

As a way to make small talk, she first had told him about growing up with Wook and her mother. Simple things, like how her mother ran their household and had taught her, or how she used to take books from her brother's room, and when he found her bent over them next to the pond he would read for her and teach her many things.

As time went by, he began to ask about other aspects of her childhood, of their brothers, things she used to do with the king before they were exiled. They did, after all, share the same father. It was a nice way to spend quality time together, she guessed, without constant snide remarks and wars of stubbornness, and in exchange, she asked him to talk about his day. At first he refused and only gave her a few sentences, but then he seemed comfortable speaking about superficial things with her, and she did not mind to listen.

It took him a while – a very long while – but he eventually opened up about his life with the Kangs. She knew he didn't tell her half the things he could, but it was great progress that he was even doing so, not to mock her or to prove a point, but honestly speaking of his memories.

As the girls began to grow, and made mischief and cute child things, that gave them something else to talk about over dinner, after a long day. He had allowed her to be present during some sessions with his officers, arguing her sharp eye for people and how that would help him, and sometimes he would simply vent his frustrations at the table as she poured him tea.

Like that, after more than ten years, they had finally fallen into a somewhat comfortable, bearable married life.

They could not forget the past, not entirely, and she knew there were a lot of things he was not going to forgive her for. She also knew she could not be the one in his heart; but she was the one in his life, that much they had agreed on. She was his wife as well as Goryeo's Queen and the mother of his children, and he was to treat her as such.

She stared at the cup on her hands and sighed. In his own, peculiar way, he did, and she was grateful for it.

She called her maids back. They cleared the dresser and the tray, and she had them set the teapot on a small table by her bedside.

As they dimmed the lights on their way out, Queen Daemok of Goryeo got under the covers and gave herself to the embrace of sleep.

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 _Thanks for reading :3_


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